Confronting Harassment

Get the message across:

Tell the harasser what he or she has done–name the behavior.  Be specific, straightforward and blunt.

Demand that the harassment stop.

Hold the harasser accountable.  Do not pretend nothing has happened.

Remember, the harasser’s behavior is the issue–not your behavior.

Talk about the harassment to others.  Staying silent protects harassers.

Document the harassment: You will be tempted to ignore the behavior, telling yourself it will stop eventually. However, in most cases, the harassment continues.   So, keep a log of what is happening, particularly if the perpetrator is a teacher, professor, or supervisor.  Document each incident, including dates, times, names of witnesses, etc.  Save e-mails to a disc and keep it at home.  Do not throw away any mail or email that is related to the harassment, even if the mail is anonymous.

Document negative actions: Document any negative actions that you experience because of your refusal to submit to sexually harassing behavior–for example, if you are given a poor evaluation, a demotion, or low grade because of your refusal to cooperate with the sexual demands or behavior of the harasser/s.

Document your work and/or school performance. Keep copies of performance evaluations and
memos that attest to the quality of your work. Save papers and exams that have comments by your professors. Ask for written recommendations from your teachers that you can keep on file for later. The harasser may question your work or school performance in order to justify their behavior.

Formal complaints

Begin with available grievance channels: If the behavior continues, use whatever grievance
procedures are available at your school or workplace.

Document retaliation: Retaliation for complaining about sexual harassment is also illegal.  Document any instances you experience just as you would the harassment.  It is likely that the majority of the hostility comes from colleagues of the harasser, but this does not change the legality.  All retaliation is unlawful regardless of who is doing it.

Keep notes of meetings and phone conferences: Be sure to keep detailed notes of every meeting you have regarding the harassment, including dates, names of participants, and the meeting results.

Adapted from Sexual Harassment Support (www.sexualharassmentsupport.org)